Should we know what we really want in a relationship before we start looking? This was the question we explored last month in part 1, as well as taking a closer look into why communication is the first key to creating excellent and long-lasting relationships. Missed part 1? Have a little read here
In part 2 we are going to look at the reasons why people stay in unhealthy/toxic relationships. And investigate which out-of-date beliefs you may be holding on to which are preventing you from unlocking the key to knowing yourself and finding love.
Knowing Yourself – Key No. 2 To Creating Excellent And Long-Lasting Relationships
“If I am to share my life with someone at some point again, I feel it’s best to love intimately the person I go to bed with every night, me.” Anna Robertshaw Founder of Anna Robertshaw Yoga.
The above quote was shared recently within my Soul Fuelled Living community. I was moved by Anna’s words of wisdom. Firstly, because it is always so refreshing when someone lets down their guard and speaks vulnerably about their feelings. Secondly, because I know how much change she has gone through to know this about herself.
Cutting ties from relationships that are no longer working for us is crucial to creating long-lasting relationships. Yes, it hurts! But it really is worth it friends.
I stayed in a toxic relationship for 13 years. A toxic relationship with myself! I was bulimic and didn’t value the beauty of my whole self until I was 33. It’s no surprise that I attracted relationships that reflected this self-image I projected out into the world.
Why Do People Stay In An Unhealthy/Toxic Relationship?
I believe people stay in unhealthy and toxic relationships for 3 reasons:
- Fear of not being enough
- Fear of change
- Fear of being alone
F.E.A.R: Face Everything And Rise.
When it comes to love as Anna boldly expresses, we need to love intimately the person we go to bed with every night. If you don’t love yourself fully then how do you expect another too?
If you are looking for love, take care as the message you hold of yourself reflects out to the world. In turn, you receive love from this wounded perspective of yourself. You attract a partner that feeds your limiting belief.
It can feel like a vicious cycle as you find yourself asking:
Why did I attract another partner who doesn’t respect me?
Why is this happening to me again?
When will I find true love?
How Do We Change Ourselves For The Better?
Changing I am not good enough into I am good enough:
“This limiting belief is so delicately woven into our biological makeup that it entwines itself like vines of lost hope, strangling the very essence of what makes us unique.”
I have created this list of affirmations to help you begin to change yourself for the better?
Say out loud the following:
I am beautiful.
I am capable.
I am courageous.
I am worthy.
I am worthy of loving myself.
I am worthy of receiving love.
I am love.
Now take some time to reflect even journal with the following questions:
Did it feel comfortable or uncomfortable to say these things about yourself?
Do you believe these things about yourself?
Once we have debunked how we perceive and play out this limiting belief your own love story will have the space to grow. You are finally ready. In this state of self-love and knowing yourself, you will naturally attract the right person to you.
How Do We Attract The Right Person To Us?
In part 3 we will be exploring how you can start making these changes so you can fully own your decisions, reactions, and actions and attract the right person to you.
About The Author
Natalie lives in the South of Spain with her soul mate and Cockerpoo. She is the author of Light The Way and Soulpreneur with a passion for guiding people to tune into their innate wisdom, find sanctuary in their hearts and freedom in their souls.
Through her work as a writer, radio presenter and intuitive coach Natalie empowers people to push to their edges: to embrace their wild, honour their inner goddess and to begin truly dancing with life.
As a leader, and founder of Cosmic Soul Coaching she embodies all aspects of her raw, divine femininity while breaking conventions, creating change, and paving the way for others to follow.
Her unique strength lies in her gentle, loving essence and intuitive, mystical powers which light the way for souls to rise, awakening to their mastery and owning it fully.
A natural communicator with music, dance, creativity, and colour flowing through her DNA, Natalie translates the light she sees in the world into something tangible to amplify the human experience.
Feel free to learn more about Natalie’s work by visiting www.nataliefarrell.co