Dr Deborah Lee – Why Are So Many People Unhappy?

When you look around you and you’re having a bad day, it’s easy to think the world is out to get you. Life is hard, and bad things happen at every turn. However, what you need to realise is this is a false assumption. Life is full of up’s and down’s, but it’s how you deal with them that matters. And that’s where, taking charge of your own levels of happiness, or unhappiness, come in to play.

Your brain has adapted over millions of years to keep you safe from harm. If your body perceives a threat, there is an outpouring of the stress hormone cortisol. The sympathetic nervous system bursts into action with a massive influx of the neurotransmitters adrenaline and noradrenaline.  Your body is ready to run – your heart beats faster, you breathe more rapidly and start to sweat.

After the danger has gone, our parasympathetic nervous system kicks in and everything settles back to a calmer more relaxed state.

Now, if on a daily basis, you are on edge and startle at the smallest hurdle, your body will be constantly on edge. This is chronic stress, and its very unpleasant. Living with chronic stress makes you feel anxious, unwell and unhappy.

So, what can you do? You can’t change the miserable events that life throws at you every day. But you can change how you react to them. That’s where learning techniques to keep your feelings and emotions under control comes in. You can teach our body to respond less aggressively to threats.

When Things Go Wrong

  • It’s In Your Mind Set – Ask yourself how bad is this really? Usually, no one is dead or dying, it’s just a problem that needs sorting out.
  • Practice Deep Breathing – Learn how to breathe deeply using your diaphragm. This switches on your parasympathetic nervous system and helps you keep calm.
  • Don’t Catastrophise – Don’t waste time thinking ‘what if’ – just deal with here and now.
  • Adopt A Positive Outlook – Optimists live 15% longer than pessimists! Try to see the glass as half full and not half empty.
  • Develop A Coping Mechanism – Sleep on it and reply tomorrow. It’s true, everything seems better after a good night’s sleep. Think what allies you have – who could you ask for help? Get your facts straight before you do anything. In fact, saying and doing nothing may be the best strategy! Do not put it all on social media. This will be a disaster that will come back to haunt you!
  • Work On Your Self Esteem – People with higher self esteem have higher levels of resilience, meaning they bounce back better from life’s traumas.


Owning The Problem

Being happy is not anyone else’s problem – it’s completely up to you! You need to look at the choices you have in life and grab them with both hands. Too many people blame everyone else but themselves – yet the answer is right there inside them.

The only person who can really change your life – is you!

Time to make a start! What changes could you make to change your life for the better?


About The Author

Sexual and Reproductive Health Specialist, Medical and Healthcare Writer

Having worked for many years in the NHS, mostly as Lead Clinician within an integrated Community Sexual Health Service, Dr Deborah Lee now works as a health and medical writer, with an emphasis on women’s health. Dr Lee is a  medical content writer for Dr Fox, (Dr Fox Online  Pharmacy).

Dr Lee writes for many media outlets including The Daily Express, The Sun, The Mirror, Bella, Cosmopolitan, Marie Claire, Net Doctor, and many more. She remains passionate about all aspects of medicine – including obesity, weight loss, diet, sleep, and nutrition.

After qualifying from University of Southampton Medical School in 1986, Dr Lee trained as a GP and after a number of years specialised in Sexual & Reproductive Health (S&RH).

S&RH is a very broad speciality which includes for example: Gynaecology and Medical Gynaecology, all types and aspects of contraceptive care including coils and implants, dealing with unplanned pregnancies, abnormal smears, screening and treating STIs in both males and females, Young People’s Sexual Health, Sexual Assault, and in particular Menopause Care – which has been her special interest. Dr Lee set up and ran her own specialist menopause clinic.

During this time, Dr Lee wrote extensively, and had numerous medical publications, as well as working as sub-editor for a medical journal. She has also written articles for The Huffington Post UK under the pseudonym Dr Daisy Mae.

Medical education and training has also been a large part of Dr Lee’s professional career. She has been a Contraception & Sexual Health Trainer, a Faculty Examiner  and a Training Programme Director.

I strongly believe in the power of the pen. I am passionate about healthcare. If someone reads something I’ve written and it helps them make a good healthcare choice, then my job has been worthwhile,’ says Dr Lee.


GMC no. 3129913

Dr Deborah Lee/ Dr Daisy Mae 

Freelance Health Writer  https://healthcarewriterdr.com/services/